elusive

At least I’m still alive, eh?

First of all, I mangaged to get the flu once again. Yes. Not only that, I was a tad…er, emotional and PMS-y, and then I had an observation on top of it all which always = stress. Recipe for disaster? I think so. After my obs. & interview on Wednesday and I went back to class, M. (my co-operating teacher) asked me how it all went — I literally broke down into tears and had to leave and go to the bathroom. It’s a good thing there was only 10 minutes to go until lunch. In the bathroom I bawled and bawled, and it was the kind of crying you do when you’re a kid (well, I did when I was a kid, anyway) where you cry so much you get short of breath and can’t breathe and you’re gasping for air all at the same time? It was terrible. M. came after me a few minutes later and was really wonderful about everything. I couldn’t explain to her (or to myself for that matter) why I was upset. The lesson wasn’t terrible, the interview wasn’t terrible, but I was still a wreck. Anyway, then it was lunch so I went to the staff room, and you know how when you’re already upset and someone asks you “How are you?” or “How did it go?” or something along those lines and it makes things worse? Well some of the other interns at the table did, of course (we all do when we have observations) ask me that. Cry, cry all over again. Michelle, another intern, was just SO absolutely wonderful to me. She took me aside and talked to me a bit. I managed to get through lunch after without breaking down once more.

But oh God. I’ll never get over that. I’m so humiliated. Let’s see if I can make it through the next 5 weeks without anymore damage shall we?

Friday. Halloween. Urg. And oh my LORD were the kids hyper. They had so much food! There were 4 sets of cupcakes, 1 black cat cake, a huge box of Doritos, various assorted mini chocolate bars, 3 different treat bags filled with candy, 40 timbits… and a partridge in a pear tree! No not really, but they did also have lunch AND a party snack. I said to them that they’d be too sick to eat supper, let alone candy from trick-or-treating. Oy. I went to bed about 8pm Friday night. I was so tired.

BUT, last night was fun. Me and the girls (and one of our guy friends) went to the Mardi Gras downtown. Me, as per usual, was the odd one out because I really did not want to dress up as the Professor on Gilligan’s Island, and it would be lame to have 2 Mary Anns or 2 Gingers…so, I made up my own costume. I dug out one of my old black skirts and a nice black shirt (that shows too much cleavage to wear in a primary/elementary school, but is not particularly offensive in public places, lol), and my friend brought her witches hat for me to wear. I called it a Pimp Witches Hat. Heh. It had a band of red feathers going around the rim. It was awesome. We said that I was the guest star that week on Gilligan’s Island — a cross-over episode with Bewitched, perhaps? Anyway, it was fun. We went to my friend’s house and drank for awhile and then headed to the bars. SO many people were there. There were line ups to all of the bars, but we got in to one eventually and danced and drank some more. Good times. On the street it was so crowded but we didn’t see many people we knew. We ran into a couple of boys we knew from High School (urg. Long history there and it’s too much to get into. Good thing I was nice and drunk) and chatted for awhile. I was DYING for some Subway. Why is it that when you drink you always get so hungry? I never usually give into my food-while-drinking-urges, but there’s a Subway right on the corner of George St. — soooo convenient. The line up was hell (they must make so much money at that location) but I had me a sub at 3am this morning. I’m not so much hungry today though. The costumes were really good last night. I saw a guy dressed as a shower, another guy as a toothbrush, a bunch of people as a deck of cards — some people are so damn creative.

Ooh. Lizzy, you’re mean. That “2 truths with 1 lie” thing (that is, if you DO get to see it in advance)? So not nice. Heh. I haven’t decided yet what, or IF, I want to know anything about Revolutions. I think I’ll dig around before I see it to find out if there is any deaths (I know they’ll be some, but certain particular ones) — that’s my big thing. Thanks for the fic rec! I really love her fics. I’ve read that one before, but it’s always good to reread good stuff like that. I know what you mean about the XF S8 DVD’s too — they’d have to be way cheap for me to buy them. But I’m so easy, I still might buy them and use the crap eps for pretty, shiny coasters.

Heh, Kate. Catherine prattling on about her past on CSI steadily increases as the show goes on — like literally in every episode. And I’ve read spoilers for upcoming eps…and, well, let’s just say that these days I don’t know whether to laugh at her or slam my head against something. Hard. I’m glad you’re watching though! Sara rules! And the GSR is out there. I swear.